Monk Stalking

Yes, I did it. I stalked a monk. But I’ll get to that in a minute.

Harbor in Taiwan

First off, Taiwan wakes up at 5 am. That’s pretty incredible considering that it stays up later than 2 am. Perhaps like the NY City that it resembles so much it my head, it too never sleeps. Around 9 am this morning, I finally got up the courage to venture out on my own. For those who know me well, and how directionally challenged I am, you’ll be amazed that I was even able to find my room again at the end of the night (not without its own challenges). But, the day started out with a bad omen for my ability to navigate the city. It started with me not able to figure out how people made the little metro cards work the wicket. Infuriating. I thought for sure my card was broken, but it turns out I was just putting it near the entirely wrong part of the machine. Sigh. I finally get onto the platform and this older guy walked by me seriously inches from my face. He circles me and says “Oh. Ooohhh.” As he began to walk away (and my eyebrow uncontrollably raised in a, “huh?!”) he said “So beautiful! Ohhh.” Ummm…okay. Sure. Who doesn’t like to be told they look beautiful in the morning, particularly after 22 hours on an airplane? “Thank you.” I managed. He asked if I was lost, and at the moment, I wasn’t. So, he wished me well and we parted ways.

I had a plan. According to my Lonely Planet guide, I would exit the station and proceed to the nearest famous temple. From there, I would venture into the artisan district and maybe even to a museum or the arts park. Ha! I had a plan. A plan that rested on my ability to navigate. After and hour of walking around and not seeing any signs for any temples that were on my list, I resigned myself just to find the temples listed on some of the side streets. No luck. I nearly walked from one train station to another. Then a monk walked by. We were going opposite directions, but I noted her– wondering where she might be wandering off to. It didn’t occur to me to follow her until we passed each other again going the opposite direction (yes, I was walking in circles, thanks). So, I did what any dehydrated traveler desperate to see just one temple in Taiwan before she leaves would do. I stalked her. 10 paces behind. She. walked. slow. You know why? I’m pretty convinced it was because she knew I was following her. At first it was funny. Then it was not. She was doing the “I’m window shopping at a backward angle in this giant shop window so I can actually see if you’re still behind me” thing. Yes. I’m still there. Pretending to be preoccupied with my guide book. The really sad thing is, it’s not just me that knows I’m stalking this monk. Everyone (shop owners and other people standing about) just watched me walk up and down this same street. You know they noticed. Despite the “oh, don’t worry. There are foreigners everywhere in Taiwan!” speech that I got before I left, I’ve yet to see more than 10. They definitely noticed me wandering around. Now, they’re watching me stalk this poor woman. I’ve lost all shame at this point. Taiwan is hot. I want to see a temple. Now. Seriously. But, alas, she outsmarts me by ducking into a mall to go shopping. Shopping? Really? Fully dressed in your monk-garb? Okay. I get it. You’re on to me. I wasn’t exactly subtle. Foiled again!

Close enough!

Did I mention that it’s hot? I keep wandering. And wandering. I will see something worthy of “sightseeing.” I will. Ummm…the road ran out and ended in a harbor.  A dirty, dirty harbor that my pictures make look beautiful. That doesn’t count. I would like to bash whoever put little kiosks all over Taiwan with the “you are here” stickers on them. I appreciate your effort, but none of these temples and shrines exist! NONE! Just keep walking. Walking. Walking. And…then there’s the staring. Yes, I know I’m out of place. Yes, I know I’m about to get hit by that car. It is so hot! And then I realized that I couldn’t see properly out of my glasses. When I took them off, I realized I’d been blinking little splotches of sweat all over them. HOT! At this point, I recall that my guide here, Carrie, had put on my checklist last night “Do you have an umbrella?” I thought maybe it rains alot here. That is not the reason. Note to self: umbrella is for the unrelenting sun, not for rain. I will give this walking thing one more hour. And then I see it. Nestled among some odd trees squished between tall, dilapidated apartment buildings. I go in despite all the looks that indicate I’m intruding. I wander around. Okay. Good enough. I hate to be that kind of tourist, but hot hot hot!

I get on the train, realize I’m going the wrong direction, get off, get on, change trains, realize I’m going the wrong direction, get off, get on, change trains. I don’t mind getting trains wrong. Buses are really the worst. Oh, and walking around aimlessly! So I make loops all around the various stations. The train’s actually pretty easy to navigate, which you wouldn’t know from my experience. Thank goodness they don’t charge for loops! I decided at this point that trains are really the way to see the country in a hurry. I finally make it to my intended station– last on the line (how hard should that have been to find, really??). I’m all the way out there just to take the gondola. Why is there a gondola as part of a metro system? That’s what I wanted to find out.

Gondola always sounds so much better in my head than in real life. Did I mention I’m afraid of heights? I realized while standing in line that everyone was waiting for the glass-bottomed version. No thanks! I thought it would be a good idea to see Taiwan from the air since I’ve got a limited amount of sightseeing time. It is a good idea. It was a good idea. And intellectually I understand the physics behind how they work. And I know that if they weren’t safe against weather, they certainly wouldn’t be so popular in ski resort areas. But when the wind whistles through the car and make it rock back and forth, I lose all faith in physics. Holy cow. I stopped at some beautiful shrines. More people staring at me, but I probably was a bit of an eyesore at that point! Some tea houses, some more walking. This is a whirlwind tour if ever there was one!

I ate unidentified meat on a stick, because that’s the only thing I was brave enough to order. And then, when I finally arrived at the conference, I had a snack of sweetened mashed potatoes with corn on top of a baguette. Not what I imagined of Taiwanese food- but I’m sure I’ll find something “authentic” soon enough. After the conference reception I stopped by 7-11 to get some food and ended up with two onigiri. It’s funny, but all I find here is Japanese food. Soba, sushi, oden and onigiri. At least with the onigiri, I can read enough chinese characters to determine with a high degree of certainty what is contained within the rice wrapped in seaweed. No complaints here!

Time to prep for tomorrow’s presentation before I fall asleep. My pedometer logged 18,414 steps today– more than any day I’ve ever logged before!