The frustrated, inappropriate language has been censored from this post for your reading pleasure.
I left my room at 7:30 this morning– plenty of time to make it to my conference by 8:30 which is only about 20 minutes away. Instructions in hand, I headed in search of a bus station. The buses are all numbered, but there’s a catch. First off, I can’t read the routes, so I have to take my directions at their word. Second, there isn’t just one bus stop per area; there’s a string of bus stops some distance apart (some are close together, most not) and at each, a bus number with route is posted. Since I can’t read the routes, I just look for my number. I walked all along the main road next to the train station in the area I’m staying. Despite the fact that there are several buses I could take, these numbers are not at any of the stations I encountered.
Getting a little frustrated, I decided to take the train up two stops (opposite from my intended directions) and follow the directions provided by the university website. At this stop, there’s an almost unlimited number of buses I can take, so I figured my chances were better. In fact, there are almost too many buses. I accidentally landed at this bus stop last night when I was desperately lost in the city. When I finally figured out which train exit led me to that bus area (exit number is not part of standard directions– silliness!), I had to figure out which direction to get on the bus. I figured since I was coming from the university last night, in order to go to the university, I should take the bus that comes in the opposite direction from which I had come last night. That makes sense, right? The directions say take bus 236 or 237. The first bus pulled up, I tried to get on, and the bus driver mumbled something at me. I asked him “What?” and he simply said “no.” and motioned for me to get off. So…is this not the bus I need (how does he know where I’m going?) or am I just more trouble that it’s worth? I showed him the conference program but he wasn’t convinced, so I got off. A few minutes later, another Bus 236 shows up, so I hop on thinking that I’ll still make it to the university in time– definitely before my presentation.
The problem with buses, rather than trains, is that I can’t see the route map and know where we are along the way. Sure, the announcements for the next stop are in English as well, but what’s after that? How do I know that I’m even heading in the right direction? At some point, about 20 minutes into the ride, I recognized some of the stops from names on the train map. I was definitely going the wrong direction. Fine. I’ll just got off and got back on the same number but on the other side of the road (read 8 lane road). So I got off and, in my panic I suppose, I didn’t think to look at the fact that the road was one way! Here’s a newsflash: you can’t cross the street and take a bus going the opposite direction on a ONE WAY STREET. Arrrrrghhhh.
I asked a police officer where the train was, but he only responded (in perfect English) “I don’t speak English. Sorry!” Arrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh. Not knowing in which direction I should walk to catch the same number bus, I just took the next bus that said it was going to Taipei station. PLEASE just get me back on a train so I know where I’m going!!!!! The bus appeared to be taking forever to get to Taipei station so I braved a closer stop. The problem with being directionally challenged is that, once arriving at a bus stop near a particular train station, you then have to find the station entrance. Infuriating!!!! Eventually, I got back on the train, realized that I’d traveled much, much farther in the opposite direction from the university that I’m willing to admit. An hour train ride (I’m already an hour in to this fiasco) and a 15 minute bus ride from the middle of nowhere and I arrive at my destination just 40 minutes before my 10:30 session time. Holy cow, that was close. Does that mean I need to leave by 5:30 am tomorrow morning? I think not! Silly buses. Why can’t everything be on a train line. Argh. Frustrated. All that aside, Taiwan is actually quite beautiful from the windows of the train. I highly recommend it!
Jet lag setting in. Must sleep…
Oh dear! I don't know how you didn't vomit from nervousness.